


Free Food

by Alexgrand



Category: One Piece
Genre: Alternate Universe - Restaurant, Flirting, Fluff and Humor, Food, Gen, I'm Sorry, M/M, One Shot, PWP without Porn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-05
Updated: 2019-07-05
Packaged: 2020-06-09 18:06:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19481197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alexgrand/pseuds/Alexgrand
Summary: Zoro pretends to get stood up at a restaurant to get a free meal because who doesn't love free food!?





	Free Food

**Author's Note:**

> A/n: Hello and happy Friday! Thanks for checking this out. It's based off a prompt I saw on Pinterest.

_Free Food_

_Diable Jambe_ was two hours away from closing when Zoro pushed past its doors. The culinary aroma in the air sent his stomach growling. From the way the lobby was extravagantly decorated, he could see that dinner wasn't going to be cheap. 

“Hello, how are we this evening?” a tangerine-haired hostess beamed. Her name tag read “Nami.” Zoro avoided direct eye contact and mumbled, "Hi, I’m expecting someone.”

Nami grabbed two menus. “Name of the party?”

“Oh, we didn’t make a reservation. Kinda spur of the moment.” 

“No worries, there’s no wait. This way please.” Nami had Zoro follow her to a corner booth. The lights were dimmed so low the atmosphere came across as erotic. A nude painting by Manet and a still scenery by Monet hung from the walls. 

“May I have your name? I’ll let your date know you’re here when she shows up.” 

“Zoro.” He watched Nami scribble his name down on a scratch sheet of paper once she returned to her podium. As she busied herself with front of house chores, Zoro exhaled. 

Holy shit. Lying is so easy, he thought. No wonder people did it so much. To keep looking convincing, Zoro pretended to be texting his “date.” 

_Getting a free meal_ , he texted his friend Johnny. 

Johnny: _What?_

_Using your fake date idea to get free food._

Johnny: _Oh! Dude, I’ve actually never went through with that before! Let me know if it goes well!_

Dammit Johnny. 

Zoro sank into the soft cushions of his seat. The restaurant wasn't too busy tonight. Being there certainly was a break from the mayhem at the dojo. Zoro loved his job as a Judo instructor and all but the little breaks of solitude he occasionally took kept him sane.

Teaching kids brought him joy. His salary brought him enough money to afford good takeout every once in a while but fancy restaurants? Off limits. Today, however, Zoro wanted to see if he could swindle dinner out of a waitress. 

“Good evening,” a gentleman swung by with a glass of water and a bread basket. Blonde strands curtained one of his blue eyes. The exposed one glistened under a distinctly curly brow. It wasn't his face that stood out as much as his lithe frame and charming aura. “My name’s Sanji and I’ll be your server this evening.” 

Zoro had to take a few seconds to collect himself. He wasn’t expecting his waiter to look...appealing? Yeah. That.

Sanji glanced up from his notepad. “Oh, I’m sorry, are you waiting for somebody? I can come back with another water.” 

“Sure, I’m just looking over the menu till my date gets here.” Zoro opened the laminated booklet. Everything was in French. Only the prices were coherent. Those were all in double digits. 

“I recommend the Bouillabaisse. It’s a really popular item on our seasonal menu. I’ll come back once your date gets here.” the waiter then complimented Zoro's hair coloring. Lots of people assumed it was dyed, with it being green. Zoro got tired of correcting them and just started going along with it. 

Sanji swooshed by a few other tables. He certainly was charismatic. Customers ate up his small talk more than the expensive cuisine in front of them. And the way his slim body poured into that black tuxedo. Wait, why was Zoro thinking about that? 

And why did the hostess sit him in this waiter's section? There were other waitresses working. Maybe they were going home soon. Zoro tried playing it cool. He kept forgetting about the so-called plan as his gaze remained hooked on Sanji. The server could have navigated the restaurant with his eyes closed he moved so graciously. He got along well with the ladies too. 

Soon other patrons began leaving. Cash money tips rested on the table tops. Most of the wait staff had been cut for the night. If Zoro snatched one of those dollar bills no one would notice. But he was a liar, not a thief. 

Sanji flew out of the backroom to do another round. When he circled back to Zoro’s booth, he frowned sincerely. 

“Your date still on her way?” 

Zoro shrugged, “She’s not responding to any of my messages.” Nervous laughter. 

Sanji whipped out a blue pen. “Well you should at least eat something while you wait for her. Or go ahead and order for the both of you.” Zoro’s stomach, already emptier than his wallet, twisted in guilt. Maybe this wasn’t such a great idea. 

“Uh, yeah, the... _hors devours_ look good.” Zoro was sure he butchered the pronunciation. 

Sanji’s curly brow furrowed. “You mean the _hors d'oeuvres?”_ He joked that most of the customers couldn’t say the word right either. 

After he wrote Zoro's order down, Sanji struck up a conversation, "What made you want to bring your date here?” 

“I just wanted to stop by while I was in the neighborhood.”

Sanji slipped his notepad into his front pocket. “Do you live pretty close?” 

“Yeah, up north in Roseville. I work at a dojo off Midway.” Zoro immediately regretted spilling so much. He was hoping to not make himself traceable. 

“Roseville is actually south,” Sanji chuckled. “The dojo in Midway sounds familiar. Koushirou Sensei still runs it, right?” 

Zoro lit up. “That’s right. You’ve heard of it?” 

“Used to go there as a kid but my old man pulled me out of the program for culinary training. So do you teach or are you a student?” 

“I teach Judo. I’m a black belt.” The once over Sanji gave him after he said that did not go unnoticed. It wasn’t lecherous but inquisitive. The kind of gaze Zoro threw at his opponents before a spar. Trying to gauge where their weaknesses and strengths lied. 

“Haven’t seen Sensei in years,” Sanji rested his knuckles on the table and sighed. “Sakazuki still there?” 

Zoro had seen Sakazuki fight a few times but it was nothing memorable. He retired a while ago. “He’s not there anymore."

"Oh," Sanji smoothed the creases in his suit. "He was my teacher. Was pretty bummed when I couldn't go to lessons anymore."

"You’re welcome to stop by and spar with me anytime.” Zoro realized he got too carried away. 

“I might take you up on that.” Sanji smiled.

Neither said anything for a moment. Zoro thought the room was closing in on them. His palms became sweaty. 

Sanji suddenly excused himself, “Well, I should go enter your order. Hope your date shows up. She’s a lucky gal.” _Wink._

OK, Zoro had to have been blind not to see that. 

Out the corner of his eye he could see Sanji clearing the other tables. Zoro's was the last open table left. Sanji had removed his jacket, loosened his tie, and unbuttoned the top part of his undershirt. They were an hour away from closing. 

The waiter came by with a tray full of food. “I apologize if I’m being too direct but I think your date stood you up.” 

Zoro feigned hurt. “Looks like she did.” 

“Well, I told the chefs about your situation.” he nodded at the tray he was carrying single-handedly. “Consider this one on the house.” The waiter set a whole full course dinner down on the table.

The smell alone made Zoro’s mouth water. Every entree was textbook, perfectly crafted and beautifully presented. Sanji slid into the booth and pointed to the plate closest to Zoro. “This is _Salade Niçoise_ ,” he then continued clockwise. _"Coq au Vin, Ratatouille , Confit de Conard,"_

Zoro would have listened to him go on forever had he not been so famished. The server let him have at it and he ran through the food quickly, ravenously. The whole time Sanji regaled him with the story of how he got into Judo during his younger years.

Apparently he had to take a break from it to help his family out with their restaurant. On the side Sanji worked extra jobs to save up for a membership at a Muay Thai gym downtown. Zoro imagined what the waiter would look like after exerting himself. He shoved those thoughts away and focused on eating. 

The last course was dessert: _crème brûlée._ Zoro handed Sanji one of his spoons despite the waiter’s protests. Ever persistent, Zoro convinced him to share so he'd feel better about getting “stood up.” 

The texture of the dish was soft, creamy. They took turns dipping their silverware into the ramekin and eventually their knuckles brushed against each other. Zoro felt his skin grow hot. He wasn’t hungry for food anymore. 

Sanji broke the silence. “It’s late. I’ll get you a box to take home.” He did not take his hand away immediately. 

“Thanks.” Reluctantly Zoro withdrew his spoon. Sanji bussed the table and carried the dishes in a tray on his shoulder to the back. Minutes later Nami handed Zoro his leftovers in a bag and told him to come again soon. 

In the parking lot Zoro sat in his car for a solid ten minutes. His phone buzzed, a message from Johnny knocking him out of his reverie. 

Johnny: _Hey, you washing dishes yet?_

Zoro texted back, _That only happens on TV, moron. And yes I got my meal comped._

Johnny: _It actually worked? You lucky dog._

Zoro set his phone down so he could start his engine. On his way home he made more wrong turns than usual. Remembering that smooth-talking server had him distracted. At his apartment he placed his box of leftovers in the fridge and headed off to bed. 

The next day Zoro showed up at the dojo refreshed. Class was the usual for his students but to him it was thrilling. For lunch he brought last night’s leftovers, which transported him back to that booth at _Diable Jambe_. Each bite recreated the time he spent with Sanji. 

Around 7:00 pm Zoro had to close shop. He enjoyed the peace and quiet as he piled up training mats. When the front door opened, he thought one of his students had forgotten something. It was someone else, however. A man in a light jacket and a pair of sweats. 

Zoro stopped and recognized Sanji, who sheepishly waved and said, “Hey. I, uh, meant to show up while you were open but traffic was terrible."

"It's ok," Zoro’s throat went dry. "Did you want to spar now?"

Sanji stripped his jacket off. The tank underneath provided Zoro a generous view of his long torso. "Ready when you are."

Since he only had on a pair of jogging pants too, Zoro skipped running through protocol for a typical spar. He decided to go with what they had on. Truth be told, Zoro had not expected Sanji to follow up on his offer so soon. 

"How long has it been since you've practiced Judo?" Zoro began walking around the mat he laid out for them. "Too long." Sanji was slowly circling around him the same way he did around the tables at the restaurant. Zoro liked seeing him out of a suit and tie. This Sanji appeared much more down to earth. 

Zoro threw a few blows that Sanji blocked. The amount of upper body strength he had surprised Zoro. 

"Not bad. How's your footwork?" Zoro was on the floor a split second after asking that question. Sanji crawled on top of him with a cocky grin. 

“Did you ever get in touch with your date?” 

Zoro caught his breath. “Y’know what, I don’t think it’s gonna work out between me and her."

"Really? Why not?" As if realizing the kind of position they were in, Sanji started to rise off. Zoro steadied the blonde's hips to keep him in place.

"I found someone better." 

**Author's Note:**

> THANK YOU for all the feedback, critiques, and love!! I was not expecting it. You all are awesome and give me life. I met the love of my life at a restaurant (not this way—I wish!) so this story has a special place in my heart. Have a great week~


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